;
Promotional Tour (Semifinals – Pool C)

Behold the last leg of the TripleBanger Promotional Tour before we reach our main event. First off, my sincerest apologies on repeatedly giving competitors and loyal readers the wrong date. This March 29th nonsense is incorrect and would give the survivor of Pool C literally no time to prepare a column for the championship round. Therefore, the three-way Finale has been penciled in for Thursday, March 31st; thus meaning we crown the newest Main Page writer during WrestleMania 27. So after you finish the show, make sure to stop by and check out which competitor won the vacant spot. Here are the final/current vote tallies for Pool A & B:

[Pool A]

Priest – 34 (Eliminated)
Mavsman – 37 (Advances)

[Pool B]

OniBarubary – 21
Da_shee – 16

Mmmhmmm… I hope you grimy bastards are proud. You allowed an original member of the TripleBanger in P-Diddy to get bounced by CF scum! Nah but in all seriousness, the Semis of Pool A were a nail biter and a true heavyweight bout. I’m extremely grateful for Priest’s many contributions to the column series. As far as Pool C is concerned, any and all votes for the participants should be sent to SkitzLOP@aol.com. Cheerleading for whichever party is perfectly acceptable until 9pm Eastern US on Sunday evening. The word cap for this round has been set at 2,000 and no other weak stipulations apply.

Saturday Afternoons -
ChrisBear and Special Guests

“If you don't get feedback from your audience, you’ll think you can’t put a foot wrong.”
- Johnny Saint

After my last entry I was overwhelmed with the thirst for knowledge some of you reader-folk have. I was unsure if writing about British wrestling would have an audience. How wrong I was, and how wrong I was that anyone other than a Brit would give two hoots about it. So, I’ll refer to specific feedback once again, as my inspiration for this column...

From an Unnamed Reader “Chris, for ages now I have heard/read you Brits talk about World of Sport, and the World of Sport ‘style’ what was it that made it so special?”

This email came from Italy of all places, but it got me thinking, with all the people I speak to, all the research I complete, WoS wrestling had an impact on everyone that viewed it... Why? I’ve spoke about it so many time to so many people, written about it a dozen times. Using past columns, some new research and the help of a couple of ‘vets’ who were around in the WoS era, I hope to give you an insight into just what made WoS so special for the people that watched it.

Long before the ‘Monday Night Wars’ there was a battle brewing on these shores. After a long working week, Britain needed to be entertained, Britain had a choice to make. World of Sport, or Grandstand. Both showcased the best in British sport, football through to hockey, and even once... tiddlywinks. For many, the choice was easy...

Time: 4.15pm.
Location: A British living room, in front of the television.
Why: Awaiting the arrival of the line...
“Greetings, grapple fans”

That line is the first thing we would hear. The words uttered were that of Kent Walton, who would welcome us in his smooth transatlantic baritone. He reigned supreme against any other commentator. We hadn’t heard anyone before live and breathe the action in front of him before. His moans, his groans, were synonymous with the theatrical mayhem ensuing before him. He was unique at the time; his sincerity ensured we took it seriously. His emotional attachment allowing us to believe what we were seeing.

WoS wrestling’s theatrical style fascinated the skeptical and credulous alike, and divided pub goers up and down the Britain as to whether the ‘sport’ was rigged or not. It was, of course, presented as a real and legitimate athletic competition. There wasn't a lot in the way of storylines or big match build up, although there were faces and heels. In ring interviews were scarce, as were promos. There would irregularly be a quick snippet with a wrestler before going to the adverts, similar to Boxing. No, wrestling on WoS was all about the wrestling. Usually, there would be two or three bouts spread over forty-five minutes. The matches were slower than the matches we are used to today, since they would generally be based around holds, and counter holds. It was forbidden that a match should leave the ring, and there was nothing in the way of trash talking, or using weapons. A serious infraction of the rules would be something like punching, choking, or rape. It meant a lot to the British people, I was too young to appreciate the value of this time. One man, however, knows all too well...

Granddad Tommy: “It was family time. I’d work all week, real graft, not sitting at a desk with a calculator like you kids. I’d go fishing in the morning, your Mum would bring you round and we would eat the catch, after chasing around you with a crab. Football, wrestling, then more football, there was always a house full on a Saturday. Then the men would go to the pub, and the women would do women’s stuff...knitting or menstruating.”

That was it, during a time when we had no internet, no more than four channels and some tough economic times WoS gave people an hour away from their humdrum lives. It was a time you could spend with your loved ones. That is why WoS was SO successful. Worth noting that WoS ran for over 30 years, a decade longer than Monday Night Raw...

Wrestling first appeared in 1955 on British television. By ensuring weight classifications were based on appearance rather than legitimate weigh-ins, promoters could match similarly sized opponents. This, and the illusion of television, meant that personality could get a wrestler over just as much as size. During this time promoters were starting to introduce characters into wrestling, from the boisterous Big Daddy, the dastardly Mick McManus, to the enigmatic Nagaskai. One man however, refused to change his style. One man believed that his unique mat wrestling ability still had a place in wrestling. Thankfully, one man stuck to his guns and continued to ‘just wrestle’.

Johnny Saint

Now, I’m possibly the biggest Johnny Saint fan you will ever find. Think of my William Regal love, then combine that with my love of Wagon Wheels, times it by nine and you’re half way there. The man is quite simply the greatest British wrestler ever, if not the world. A bold claim, but for fans of a pure wrestling nature, Saint had it all. Dean Malenko may be known as the man of a thousand holds, but Saint is truly a man who knows a thousand holds, and then some.

I have a very vague memory of watching Saint as a child; most of the memories involve family cheering him on, or telling me how good he was. It wasn’t until many years later, when I renewed my love of wrestling that I was able to watch video tapes, or YouTube that my appreciation of Saint began to flourish. Now, the purpose of me writing this series is not for you to simply take my words as gospel. I want you reader folk to be genuinely interested in what you read, and go and search matches for yourself. I won’t post videos of matches in any of my columns, what I will do though is recommend you to watch any Johnny Saint v Jim Breaks match, those matches will give you the correct sense, or even spirit of what British wrestling, or to be exact World of Sport wrestling, was all about.

What fans loved about Saint is that he was a gentleman. He is as humble as they come. When he talks about wrestling, his love of it shines through, his eyes light up, with a youthful glaze, as he speaks about his matches. He has done much to help British wrestlers throughout the years; he’s had a hand in helping the likes of Davey Boy, William Regal, Dynamite Kid and Finlay. More importantly he is nearly worshipped by wrestlers like Bryan Danielson, Colt Cabana and Chris Hero, all of whom have listed Saint as one of their favourite wrestlers. Yes, it’s fairly smarkish to refer to a certain style of wrestling as one that defines a man. But mat wrestling fans adore Saint. Fans that include me, and someone who’s ‘markism’ for Saint may well surpass my own...

Granddad Tommy: “Remember when we spoke about Nagasaki and I said he was my favourite. I’m old, and I forget things, I forgot Saint. I like him equally as much. There wasn’t a move Saint couldn’t reverse, not one. From all the wrestling I have seen I have seen Saint the most, he never stops wrestling. He is what 70? And still going strong. When I was 70 I was starting to shit my own pants. Seriously though, there was only ever really one move he would use, that rolling one, the rest looked as if it was just made up then and there. He never relied on the same basic moves every match.”

Racist, sexist, homophobic and incontinent. I learnt a lot about my Granddad during the making of this. One thing I am learning though, with all the people I speak to, whatever I read, Johnny Saint was a standout name in British wrestling.

Now, rather than just have me writing about how good it was, or allowing Granddad Tommy to disgrace himself further I was able to ‘hit up’ a few contacts at the British wrestling heritage council. Kindly they put me in contact with a guy whose word you will have to take seriously, a guy who kindly took some time to answer a few questions I had. Ladies and gents, I bring you my interview with the one, the only... Johnny Saint.

Let’s start at the beginning shall we. How did you start out in wrestling?
I was boxing for my local boys club in Manchester when I met Billy Robinson, his dad was an ex pro boxer so I moved to Bills gym to train and of course went on the mat with Billy and that's how it all began.

WoS was an institution here in the UK, what do you believe was the biggest factor in its success?
WoS, it was colourful, flamboyant, noisy and above all entertaining. People could sit in the comfort of their own homes and shout and scream at the actions if the wrestlers on screen.

You are commonly known as the greatest British wrestler ever. How do you feel about such high praise?
It’s very flattering, but I have always tried to keep my feet firmly on the ground and think that it’s more down to the fact that I have been wrestling for so long that's why people remember me.

Don’t be so humble... How did you feel when Greg Dyke took WoS off the air?
Humble, or honest? I don't know what the people in charge were thinking about when WoS was taken off TV because it was so popular, it certainly affected British wrestling in the long run, and I’ll never understand it.

Was there a favourite venue for you to wrestle in?
Easy, Manchester Belle Vue. Home.

Some of my favourite WoS matches were the ones involving yourself and Jim Breaks. What are your thoughts on your matches with him, and what are your thoughts on Breaks?
Whenever I had matches with Jimmy Breaks it was like lighting the blue touch paper, it would explode at some point because of his short temper, but he could be a very good wrestler, when he wanted to be. Our history is much documented; make of that what you will!

Who do you feel made the biggest impact from the era?
Finlay, Rocco, Regal, Billington, Davey Boy, though I may not have liked the style of some of these guys in the ring, nobody can deny that wherever they went in the world they made an impact, I took pride in watching them progress.

You attained huge success in your career, what would you count as your biggest accomplishment?
The highlight of my career would have been winning the world title on TV in 1996.

It took you a long time to grace the US with your ring time, why was that?
Opportunity, you needed a look, talent wasn’t a major factor back then. Thankfully I have a few fans that pulled some strings to make it happen.

Do you still follow wrestling? if so, what do you watch?
Bryan Danielson is a friend of mine. I have only come to grips with him in a tag match but I think his style and mine in a single match would produce a great match.

You’re still active as a wrestler, what's the secret to a long career in wrestling?!
The secret to a long career in wrestling is you have to be dedicated and always give 100%, and as in my case you have to keep yourself fit, training has always been part of my life from an early age.

Is there anyone else you would like to comment on?
Alfie Hayes what a nice guy he was, a real toff and it was fun to be in his company, I travelled a few times with him back in the Paul Lincoln days, what can I say apart from, the world would be a much happier place with a few more of his type around.

The future of British wrestlers in the WWE/TNA is looking very healthy, what are your thoughts on that?
If people like Finlay and Regal are around, they’ll be OK.

Any regrets?
Not one.

Ok, so I am aware that I have slightly gone over the 2000 word ‘rule’ I was given, but come on. Do you honestly think I can cut short a legend? Cut me some slack. A Million thanks go to Mr. Saint himself, who took the time to do this, a true gentleman.

>>> Click Here to Vote for ChrisBear!

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>MitB – What’s In A Match Type?

Have you ever had a friend that never watched wrestling? You know, never really heard much of the product? Have you ever thought what you would tell them if they asked you to explain the true essense of wrestling in a conversation? Well, obviously it's pretty much impossible to explain such a complex sport in one conversation, but since my tenure at LOP, I've devised a "How To" series of sorts. I explained what's in a gimmick, I showed you what's in an entrance, and I let you know what's in a finisher. Today, I'm going to explain What's in a Match Type. Feel free to use these survival guides in periods of distress.

One Isn't Enough

The majority matches in wrestling are one on one, and the winner can win by pinning or submitting their opponent. Every now and then, however, a number of people are needed to either settle a score, win a prize, or pick a contender for a championship. The Battle Royal just might be the most famous match to the casual viewer. The normal premise of this match is a number of wrestlers, normally twenty, are all placed in the ring and fight until only one person is physically left standing in the ring. The only way to eliminate another person is by throwing them off of the top rope. Given the large number of people in a battle royal, they are often heralded for their excitement and unpredictability. The modern battle royal is the precursor to quite possibly the biggest and most anticipated match in wrestling, the Royal Rumble. The Royal Rumble is basically a 30 man battle royal, but with two major differences. First, two competitors start in the ring and wrestle for five minutes. Then, after the two minutes, another competitor will come out every 90 seconds until only one person is standing. The other difference is that the winner of the Royal Rumble will go on to main event that year's WrestleMania, and fight for the World Championship of their choice. This match is known as a star making match, because of the push many superstars seem to receive after a good performance or winning it all together. To understand, look at this year's winner, Alberto Del Rio. Del Rio was already in the midst of a huge push, but winning the Royal Rumble this year, which was extended to include a mind boggling 40 competitors, catapulted him to the top of the sport. To older WCW fans, many of you may remember World War 3. This cluster of a battle royal had three wrestling rings, and included 60 competitors. After 30 people were eliminated, the remaining 30 all were consolidated into one ring. This was WCW's way of trying to usurp the success of the Royal Rumble.

Locked In

Another match that many casual fans will think of is the Cage Match. A cage match is a match where two or more competitors have a score to settle, and don't want interference to play a part in the match. Thus, a steel cage is place around the ropes, in order to keep the match one on one. In addition to this, the cage has come to be utilized as a very effective weapon. Most cage matches can be won by escape either over the top of the cage or through the conveniently placed door, but there are cases where the match can be won by pinfall or submission. The Hell in a Cell variation is a massive cage that extends to the ringside area. The Hell in a Cell is completely enclosed, however it doesn't stop the competitors from having the most famous moments of this match on the outside of the cell (see Foley, Mick). Created to be a more vicious and hellacious version of Hell in a Cell, the Elimination Chamber became a common place match, eventually getting its own pay-per-view. The Elimination Chamber is a huge, round structure mad of steel with 4 pods surrounding the ring. Two men start in the ring, and the other 4 superstars are in the pods. After a period of time, each person is released from their pod, and the winner is the last one not eliminated.

Seeing as a cage match is one of the main matches bookers go to for a blowoff to a feud, there are tons of variations in many different promotions. Some of you may remember the terrible WCW movie, Ready to Rumble, in which a Triple Cage match was held. In that match, the bottom cage was a Hell in a Cell, where there was a hole in the top of the cell through which you climbed through with a ladder. In the second tier, which was a normal cage, the cage was littered with weapons that you could use to attack your opponent. After you climbed through the top of cage two, cage three was a small cage in which you climbed out of the door, climbed to the very top, and retrieved the belt. To my knowledge, there's only been one actual match like this, between Diamond Dallas Page, Jeff Jarrett, and the greatest WCW Champion of all time, David Arquette. Some promotions use a cage variation called the Thundercage of Steel Asylum, where the normal cage has a curved enclosure with a hole at the top. The winner is the person who climbs through the hole in the top.

For feuds involving stables and groups, WCW had the War Games match, where two rings and a cage enclosing both rings was involved. Two men would start in the cage, and each other person would come into the match after a span of time. The winner would be the person to get a member of the other team to quit, although in later matches, pinfall or submission would end the match. TNA has added to this match with their Lethal Lockdown match. The match only uses one ring, but it has the same premise as War Games, and when the last person is in the ring, the top of the cage with weapons hanging is lowered.

Let’s Get Hardcore

The hardcore revolution of the late 90s changed wrestling forever. ECW, the Attitude Era, and the nWo changed the way wrestling was looked at and booked creatively. Now, matches involving weapons were not only just used for blowoffs to feuds. They were common place. All matches in ECW were contested under Extreme Rules, where there were no rules at all. WWE and WCW called this match a No Holds Barred Match or a Street Fight. The only thing about these matches were that the match had to end in the ring. Other than that, anything was legal. If the Falls Count Anywhere stipulation was added, then the match could end anywhere in the city limits. I've seen matches end on the street, in a river, or in the bathroom. You never know. Some matches are so personal and so dangerous that nobody can be around when it takes place. For these situations, the Empty Arena match is necessary. The most famous Empty Arena match of all time is between Mankind and the Rock at halftime of SuperBowl XXXIII.

Death From Above

Since we're talking about matches that fans love, who doesn't love the Ladder Match]? This match is the playground for the younger and more athletic superstar. To win in a ladder match, all you must do is climb the ladder in the middle of the ring and retrieve the prize, normally a championship. As easy as this sounds, it is extremely hard to do. Thanks to the Hardys, the Dudleys, and Edge and Christian, tables and chairs were added to the match to create a TLC Match, in which tables and chairs are added with the ladder for a more violent mix. TNA has a reverse version of the ladder match called the King of the Mountain match, where instead of taking the championship off the hook at the top of the ladder, you must climb the ladder and put the championship on the hook. There are a lot more rules to the match, but trust me, they're not worth reading unless you have medicine nearby. Fitting in with the hardcore revolution, ECW had their own version called the Stairway to Heaven, where the championship was enclosed in barbed wire.

In recent years, WWE has started the Money in the Bank match, where anywhere from 6 to 10 competitors face off in a multi-man ladder match to retrieve a briefcase over the ring. In that briefcase, a contract for a World Championship match at anytime in the calendar year is waiting. TNA upped the anty, creating the Feast or Fired match, where there are four poles on each turnbuckle. A ladder isn't needed, however one must climb the turnbuckle and get a briefcase. In these breifcases are a contract for a TNA Championship match, a X-Division Championship match, a Tag Team Championship match, and a pink slip denoting that you've been fired. TNA also uses a very innovative pole match called Ultimate X, in which two ropes, 15 feet in the air held by large metal structures, cross in an X and either a championship or a huge X is hanging from the bottom. To win, you must climb the turnbuckle, and dangle from the ropes to the middle of the ring and retrieve the prize.

Undertaker’s Playground

The Undertaker is synomous with many things: WrestleMania, the Streak, his legacy, and the matches that he's created. Undertaker is the originator of three signature matches. The Last Ride Match, also utilized as an Ambulance Match is where both men fight until one person is so incapacitated, that they are thrown in the vehicle of choice and driven to the hospital or cemetary. The Casket Match is where the only way to defeat your opponent is to place your incapacitated opponent in the casket at ringside. My favorite of all of the Undertaker's matches, the Buried Alive Match, is where a makeshift grave is build by the entrance ramp. The object of the match is, keeping in gimmick with the Undertaker, to bury your opponent alive. You must throw your counterpart in the open grave, and use the shovel to completely cover them in dirt. Oddly enough, the Undertaker has lost more of these matches that he's won, coming in at 1-4 in his specialty match. These three matches all lead to the legacy that the Undertaker has created in the realm of professional wrestling.

Main Event Matches

I've shown you many different match types, utilizing multiple opponents and weapons. Some matches, however, don't need them. Some matches are so important that they are only used for main event matches. One of these matches was a concept that the WWE created for multiple people. It's called the Championship Scramble. In this match, five people take part in a 20 minute match. The key to the match is that for every pinfall made, that person is the interim champion. The reigning champion after the 20 minutes is over is the actual champion. This is the match where the words, "Brian Kendrick is now the WWE Champion" were uttered. That will definitely never happen again.

Have you ever heard of the term "blood feud"? Sometimes, that term needs to be taken literally. That's what the First Blood Match is for. In this barbaric match, both men fight until one person makes the other bleed. These matches are extremely graphic, so they're rarely used. This is also the match that gave Kane his first, albeit short, WWE Championship reign when he defeated Steve Austin.

The worst thing you can do to a person in wrestling is to make them say the words, "I Quit." It's seen as a sign of weakness among these modern day gladiators. In the I Quit Match, that's the whole purpose of the match: to make the opponent say the words "I Quit" into a microphone. You can use any means necessary. John Cena threatened to throw Batista off of the stage, making him quit. Chavo Guerrero destroyed Rey Mysterio's knee in a scaffold, making him quit. In the most famous I Quit match of the past 20 years, the Rock made Mankind quit after a match involving handcuffs, 11 chair shots, and the Corporation playing a recorded version of Mankind saying "I Quit", ending the match.

In addition to making a wrestler say "I Quit," there's another match that unanimously shows superiority: the Last Man Standing Match. In this match, both men fight until one man is unable to get back to their feet before the count of ten. John Cena famously won his Last Man Standing match with Batista after duct taping his feet to the turnbuckle, thus making him unable to get to his feet.

For most older wrestling fans, the words Two Out Of Three Falls makes them giddy with pleasure. This match is the traditional wrestling fan's dream. The people in this match exhibit a high workrate, technical prowess, and sound fundamentals. Because of this, Ric Flair is probably the man most associated with this type of match. The basic premise is that you have to be better than your opponent two times out of three.

The gold standard of wrestling matches is the Iron Man Match. No other match is held with so much importance in the wrestling world. This match truly shows who the better man is. To win this match, you have to win more falls than your opponent in 60 minutes. The first Iron Man match, between Shawn Michaels and Bret Hart, went to a 0-0 tie. The match went to sudden death overtime, where the Shawn Michaels legacy began, winning his first WWE Championship. Given the length of this match, the Iron Man match is rarely utilized, and is only between two of the marquee superstars in the promotion.

FIN

>>> Click Here to Vote for Rey Ca$h!

______________________________________________________

Ooooooooh look how the time flies when you’re reading wrestling columns and whacking off. The Semifinals of the TripleBanger Promotional Tour are now 100% completed which means there’s only one step left in the process. Pool A Champion, Mavsman, now anxiously awaits the other two eventual winners who he’ll be facing in the March 31st Finale. Seeing as how there’s a 72-hour gap between now and then, I strongly urge you to vote VOTE vote VOTE vote VOTE vote VOTE vote VOTE vote VOTE vote VOTE vote VOTE vote VOTE! Then down a tasty meal for din din, watch some March Madness with the homies and resume voting. ChrisBear and Rey Ca$h know from personal experience that feedback on the Main Page is pretty fucking scarce for CFers so how about dispelling that theory? Their respective email addresses are conveniently listed below so get to clicking, vagina breath.

>>>; Email ChrisBear
>>> Email Rey Ca$h

Source: wrestlinginc.com