Translate Request has too much data
Parameter name: request
Translate Request has too much data
Parameter name: request

1. Day 327 - They're Going, Going, Gone!

2. Day 328 - "Your Winner, And STILL Internet Champion..."

3. Day 329 - TMZ And GLAAD Are Getting Out Of Hand

4. Day 330 - WWE Is Overdue An IronMan Match

5. Day 331 - Booker T Has A "Fav Five"; Here's Mine

In yesterday's column, I discussed a bunch of names that are rumoured to be making a WWE return sometime down the road. In case you missed it, I came to the conclusion that Brock Lesnar, Paul Heyman, and Chris Jericho would all make a return to the company - one day. But now, I want to look at the other side of the coin. Apparently, Chavo Guerrero's requested WWE release last week has inspired several unidentified superstars to follow in his footsteps and abandon ship on their own terms. Who might those anonymous names be? I'm glad you asked.

Kofi Kingston: I think it's fair to say that since his WWE/ECW debut four years ago, Kofi Kingston has been stuck in the midcard. Now, he's been mighty successful in that role. Winning both the United States and Intercontinental titles on multiple occasions is in less than five years is nothing to be ashamed of, but we're no longer in the 20th Century. Thanks to "inspirational videos" from idiots like Matt Hardy, many wrestlers don't want to pay their dues or hone their craft before getting a main-event push. Many want to win the world title as soon as possible. While I've never heard anything about Kofi being upset or frustrated with his position backstage, you have to imagine that it's not easy for him to sit back and win one midcard championship after another while guys who debuted after him (Alberto Del Rio, Alex Riley, etc.) are already higher up the card than he is. Kofi may not want to spend the rest of his WWE career in "midcard hell" and may be looking into other options.

Yoshi Tatsu: Yoshi is another victim of the death of WWECW. He was pushed strongly on the ECW brand, but once he was sent to RAW, he did practically nothing. I'll admit to not being a fan of his work at first, but he quickly grew on me. He has an easy presence with the audience, his matches are enjoyable to watch, and he's good at selling. That being said, Yoshi is yet to receive any sort of push or be involved in a major angle on RAW or Smackdown!. He just turned 34, which means he only has less than a decade of in-ring action left in him. The thing is, I don't see WWE doing anything serious with him anytime soon, and that's a real shame. If I were Yoshi, I'd take my skills to TNA or New Japan, where he would be treated much better.

Jack Swagger: For some reason, WWE is not capable of consistently booking Swagger in the right way. He started off strong by winning the ECW Championship within four months of his debut, but then he cooled of until he randomly won Money in the Bank at Wrestlemania 26 and became World Champion a few days later. Since then, he was involved with Michael Cole, but has done very little else of note. Despite his lisp, swagger has proven he can deliver an effective promo when needed, and he has all the tools to be a major player in the WWE. Yet, time and time again, when people are discussing the future of the company, it's names like The Miz, Del Rio, and John Morrison that pop up, never Swagger. If he continues to flounder in the RAW midcard, I would not be surprised to see Swagger ask for a premature WWE release and make a splash in TNA.

Melina: The Internet Wrestling Community is no fan of Melina, and it's hard to blame them. According to reports and interviews all over the net, Melina is nothing more than a whore who has no business being with a "good guy" like John Morrison. In fact, she's taken to Twitter constantly in recent months to bitch about WWE misusing her. Considering how unhappy she is in her position, I'm a bit shocked Melina hasn't already given in her two-weeks notice and found another line of work. Frankly, she's a good worker (probably better than most current WWE divas) but she has one of the worst backstage reputations of anyone I've ever heard. I say she should ask for her release before it's eventually handed to her.

Randy Orton: According to Mr. Tito, Randy Orton is very angry about being on Smackdown! and is crying about -

HAHA just kidding! Tito, you're nuts. Just because Orton isn't thrilled about being on the blue brand opposed to Monday Night RAW, there's no way in hell he's looking to "explore other options" or get out of his contract early". No matter how bad things get, Orton (nor Cena) isn't going anywhere.

So once again, Zack Ryder is making headlines. This time, it's not about the latest episode of Z!TLIS, or how he got snubbed from appearing on television for the 393rd time this year. Nope, what everyone's talking about is how Long Island Iced Z made history this past weekend by defending the Internet Championship at live events in Australia. That's right, folks; the "gimmick" belt that Ryder created solely for his YouTube show was actually defended in font of thousands of people, three nights in a row.

This is significant for many reasons. For starters, it wipes clean Zack Ryder's ridiculously long losing streak that seems to occur whenever the RAW brand tours overseas. In the past six months, WWE visited many different countries, and Ryder was always jobbing. Whether it was to Yoshi Tatsu, Ezekiel Jackson, or even Percy Watson, Ryder kept getting his ass handed to him, day in and day out. Well, Australia must be Ryder's lucky continent, because he has defeated Primo (not much of an accomplishment), officially retained his Internet Championship, and is currently on a winning streak.

Another reason the Internet Championship being defended is a good thing is because we may very well see WWE introduce the belt on television in the near future. I'm not saying next week's RAW will see Zack Ryder come out with his title and cut a five-minute promo why the Internet Championship is the most prestigious championship in history or anything, but it may very well happen. With John Cena having a stranglehold on the WWE Championship, and having no shortage of challengers, the rest of the RAW brand is left to chase after the United States Championship. Unfortunately, that title's holder - Dolph Ziggler - seems to be stuck in a never-ending feud with Kofi Kingston. As a result,, a good twenty-something RAW superstars are left competing for anything but championship.

Enter the Internet Championship. Suddenly, the rest of the brand has something they can chase after (because nobody wants to face David Otunga and Michael McGillicutty for the tag team championship). Ryder, presumably as a face, can immediately feud with the likes of Chris Masters, Drew McIntyre, and even Jack Swagger for the title. These matches and feuds could take place exclusively on "Superstars", but it would also make sense for them to compete on RAW, to give them more exposure. Hell, if Ryder is able to establish himself with the Internet Championship, he may even set himself up for bigger feuds down the line with guys like The Miz and Alberto Del Rio.

By the way, I am absolutely loving the apparent decision to turn Ryder face. I've never seen the RAW brand as heel-heavy as it is now, and it would have been difficult for Ryder to make an impact with all the competition. Do you think Ryder would have stood a chance competing against CM Punk, R-Truth, Dolph Ziggler, Alberto Del Rio, and many more for a spot as one of RAW's top heels? Probably not. However, as a face, Ryder has all the room in the world to move up the card. Rey Mysterio's getting on in age, so is Big Show, Alex Riley is still pretty green, and Kofi Kingston refuses to feud with anyone other than the United States Champion. If Ryder and his internet championship are going to make it, it's going to be as fan favourites, not as villains.

Of course, WWE may decide to not even acknowledge the Internet Championship as an official title belt, and never even mention it on television, which would make today's column a complete waste of time. But I don't think that's the case. WWE has been quietly hyping up Ryder, or at least, their website is. Even though he didn't appear on last Monday's show, Ryder was pictured alongside Cena, Mysterio, Miz, Punk, and other top superstars on the roulette wheel. WWE is also getting ready to launch a new shirt for Long Island Iced Z, as they recently asked fans to vote on Facebook and Twitter for their favourite design (I went with "I'll Fist Pump Your Face!"). Finally, Ryder is currently featured on the homepage of wwe.com, posing with Australian fans.

Am I grasping at straws? Or is WWE slowly getting serious about Zack Ryder? One thing I know for sure is come January 1, 2012, Ryder will still be employed by the WWE, and may be much higher on the card than he is now (take that, Hustle!).

WWE have a serious problem. I'm not talking about declining Pay-Per-View buyrates, superstars wanting to leave, or Smackdown!'s laughable ratings. Instead, they have two bullies up their ass. The first one I'm sure you've heard of, his name is TMZ. TMZ spends all his time stalking celebrities, corporations, big-shots, etc. waiting for any one of them to slip up and expose their "bad side". TMZ doesn't "report". TMZ gossips, and tries to make people look as bad as possible.

Unfortunately for WWE, TMZ have been working overtime to expose their weaknesses. TMZ was dying to bring up another steroid scandal the second they learned Randy Savage had unexpectedly died, but they didn't get the chance to do so. Instead, they went back to spying on WWE and it's employees, and they eventually found gold when CM Punk was caught mouthing off to a fan at a recent live event. They wasted no time in "reporting" the "news" in another attempt to - you guessed it - make WWE look bad.

To make matters worse, another one of Vince McMahon's archenemies stepped in to aid TMZ in their war against wrestling. GLAAD took offense to CM Punk's "homophoic slur" and complained. As a result, WWE ordered Punk to apologize, just as they ordered Michael Cole and John Cena to excuse themselves for "inappropriate remarks" a few months back. Granted, Punk may have crossed the line by saying what he did, but it's hard to consider his comments punishable, especially since they weren't said on television, nor were they recorded on Twitter or another social website.

I think it's time we ask ourselves when is WWE going to man up and stop giving in to these corporate bullies? I understand TMZ is mainstream media, but who cares if they upset some paparazzi? It's not like they're going to air a "Wrestling Is Awesome" special anytime soon. As for GLAAD, I'm aware of the whole sponsorship deal they have with the WWE, and the PG rating is in sync with it, but WWE cannot allow their superstars, divas, and other employees to be ridiculed by some angry, anti-homosexual teasing group. At this rate, we may no longer see divas wear bikinis or swimsuits to the ring because it would be "too revealing" and "disturb the other groups". Get serious, bro.

Look, I have nothing against homosexuals, bisexuals, or the paparazzi in general, but just as WWE's performers should know their limits, it works both ways. If GLAAD wants to complain about John Cena using the word "faggot" or "gay" to describe the WWE Universe or the viewers, that's perfectly fine. But when they make a fuss because Cena called The Miz and Alex Riley a cute couple or something along those lines, that's when you know GLAAD are a bunch of trouble-makers who are grasping at straws. It's like making a deal with the devil; there's always a catch somewhere.

Is it a wise business move for WWE to disassociate themselves from GLAAD? Of course not - they would lose out from profits and sponsorship, as well as giving TMZ more ammunition to use against them. However, WWE must stop giving in to GLAAD's every demand. If the presidents of GLAAD see how easily they can influence WWE's decisions, they may even convince WWE it's wrong for superstars to wrestle without their shirts on. Forget PG, GLAAD could take WWE programming down to the "G" rating.

Vince McMahon, I've never been your biggest fan, but you have to stand up and defend your company, your creation. WWE fans tune into RAW and Smackdown! every week to view your product, not your product under a GLAAD dictatorship. Please Vince, don't let these crybabies force you to make bad decisions. You took down WCW, but you can't put up a fight against these wannabe thugs? Prove me wrong, Vince, and do what's right for the WWE.

When you recall some of the greatest matches in WWE history, very few of them had "gimmicks" attached to them. Ricky Steamboat vs. Randy Savage (Wrestlemania 3), Shawn Michaels vs. Stone Cold Steve Austin (Wrestlemania 14), The Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels (Wrestlemania 25), none of them involved a ladder, a cage, or any foreign object. Instead, it was just a couple of guys going at it in the middle of the ring, trying to prove to the world that they're the best at what they do.

However, due to a declining profit rate over the years, as well as a makeover of the entire WWE product, gimmick matches have become quite common in today's WWE, dating all the way back to The Attitude Era. It has gotten to the point that we now have an Elimination Chamber Pay-Per-View, TLC, even Hell In A Cell. The thing is, WWE has become so over-saturated with gimmick matches that they're recycling the same ones, over and over again. Yet, there's one type of match (usually a fan favourite) that WWE has not utilized in quite some time. Of course I'm talking about a good, old-fashioned IronMan Match.

Remember when I was listing some of the best matches in professional wrestling history? Well, you could controversially add Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels (Wrestlemania 12) and Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle (Smackdown!) to that list. Love them or hate them, those two bouts will forever be considered gems as well. Why? Because they were both superb IronMan matches. For sixty minutes, each man went out there, gave it his all, and take the fans on a frantic, emotional ride for sixty minutes straight (although many debate that about Hart/Michaels). The beauty about the IronMan match is that standard rules apply - there are disqualifications, count-outs, and rope breaks. It is simply two men battling for an hour, and trying to keep the fans continually interested in the action. In my opinion, it works every time.

Off the top of your head, can you recall the last time WWE gave us an IronMan Match, either on television, or Pay-Per-View? No? That's probably because the last one took place nearly two years ago, at the 2009 Bragging Rights PPV, between John Cena and Randy Orton. Was it a great match? Sure, possibly the best of their series. There was a great story told, good in-ring psychology shown by both men, and the minutes seemed to fly by. Yet for some reason, it lacked something special to place it among the top matches, or even the best WWE matches, of all-time. Maybe the fans were just tired of seeing Orton and Cena wrestle, especially since it was their fifth consecutive PPV match in a row.

It's possible that Cena and Orton's IronMan Match didn't "wow" WWE officials as much as they thought it would, thus they have been hesitant to re-introduce the match type. I mean, think about it. We're seven months into the year, and we've already seen two table matches, a ladder match, several cage matches, and just about every other gimmick match you can think of (although that's partly because of Extreme Rules). Fans of Ironman matches keep waiting and waiting, but WWE doesn't seem willing to pull the trigger and give them what they want. But in fairness, none of WWE's top, current feuds would make sense being contested in an IronMan Match. Cena vs. Punk is relatively new, Miz vs. Riley has only happened twice so far, and why would the fans believe Christian can defeat Orton more than once in sixty minutes if he is yet to pin The Viper or make him submit, one-on-one?

While an IronMan Match would not add much to the current WWE landscape, I'm hoping that the opportunity rises sometimes before the end of the year. As Orton and Cena proved two years ago -as did Angle vs. Lesnar, Benoit vs. HHH, and others - an IronMan match is the perfect blow-off to a heated feud because one man can forever prove that he is better than his opponent. Back when The Miz and Cena were feuding over the WWE Championship, an IronMan match at Over The Limit would have made a lot more sense than "I Quit" match, and Miz probably wouldn't have come out of it looking like a pussy.

The IronMan Match is a successfully proven, secret weapon that WWE clearly underutilizes. For the life of me, I'll never know why.

As hard as I try, I cannot get myself to hate Booker T. He gets so much heat from the Internet Wrestling Community, his peers, and probably even Vince McMahon himself, but I continue to enjoy his commentary. Not because he's the best announcer in the world, or because he offers "insightful commentary", but because he makes me laugh. Sure, he fucks up way too often, and it's not uncommon for him to start ranting about God-knows-what, but you can obviously see that Booker T is trying. He loves wrestling, and it's his passion for the business that allows me to forgive him for his "controversial" announcing skills.

Anyways, today's column is not about debating whether or not Booker T should be permanently removed from the announce booth. Instead, I want to steal one of his ideas and share with the world my "Fav Five". Booker T's "Fav Five" are five current WWE superstars who he not only likes, but feels is the future of the company. Even though he changed his mind several times during commentary on Smackdown!@ last night, Booker's Twitter account confirms that his official "Fav Five" consists of: Sin Cara, Ezekiel Jackson, Wade Barrett, Sheamus, and "D-Mac" (Drew McIntyre lol).

Not a bad list, but rather than dissect each selection, I'd rather share my own "Fav Five". Cool?

5. CM Punk

The reason he's ranked so low is because his WWE future is still uncertain. This whole Money in the Bank/contract expiration thing might be a work, or it could be real. If Punk is indeed leaving, no one knows what he'll do or where he'll go. It's kind of hard to call him the future of the business if he may not even be around a year or two from now. However, should WWE wise up and somehow re-sign Punk to a new contract, I think Punk could go on to have a Hall Of Fame career. He's still relatively young, and when he said he was the best at wrestling, speaking, and commentating, he wasn't really exaggerating. Love him or hate him, you have to respect the awesomeness that is CM Punk.

4. The Miz

Speaking of being awesome, this man is quickly living up to his moniker. While his push may have cooled off in recent weeks, The Miz has already established himself as a top star. Unlike past Money in the Bank world title winners, Miz has not let the loss of the world title move him down the card. His current program with Alex Riley is one of RAW's top feuds, and don't expect Miz to remain out of the spotlight for any amount of time. His in-ring skills continue to improve as time goes by, as does his value in the company. If anyone on the roster has a chance of being the third "face" of the WWE (after Cena and Orton), it would have to be The Miz - really.

3. Alberto Del Rio

A large portion of the IWC have turned their backs on ADR, but I'm not one of them. Despite a limiting and "unoriginal" gimmick, Del Rio continues to shine on WWE programming. His feuds with The Big Show and Kofi Kingston have not been very extraordinary, but his rivalry with Rey Mysterio last fall was quite entertaining. It's been heavily rumoured that Del Rio will face John Cena for the WWE Championship at SummerSlam (and the seeds have already been planted by having Del Rio become the number one contender last Monday). Like I said, Del Rio doesn't have too many different lines, but he always seems to come across as a star. I think he has everything he needs to make it big in the WWE.

2. Cody Rhodes

If you've been following my columns in recent months, you'll know how much I love Cody (no homo, bro). At first, I wasn't a fan of him dropping the "Dashing" gimmick - that theme song was awesome - but his demented character has grown on me, and the "paper bag men" are a nice touch too. The thing I like the most about young Cody is how he seems to give 100% in everything he does. A lot of his promos sound similar, but he tries to make every one stand out by pausing and adding emphasis on certain words. His matches are usually very good as well, regardless of his opponent. Unlike guys like Ted DiBiase and Michael McGillicutty, Cody is not letting his family lineage go to his head and is doing everything he can to surpass his father. It's not a question of if, but ratherwhen Cody will win his first WWE world title.

1. Zack Ryder

Sorry, were you expecting someone else? Ryder has been my favourite superstar for the past year-and-a-half (way before Z! True Long Island Story even existed) and even though he might have turned face, that doesn't make me like any less. As he referred to in the latest episode of Z!TLIS, his hard work finally seems to be paying off as WWE has plans for him to either feud or team with the current tag team champions. At the age of 26, Ryder has plenty of years left in him, and unlike other columnists (cough*HUSTLE*cough), there is no way Ryder is getting released. WWE is slowly pushing him because they know if they give him a Cena or Orton-like push and put him in the main-event before he's ready, the fans will be tired of him in less than a few years. Therefore, it is my firm belief that whether you're a member of the Zack Pack or not, you'd better get used to seeing Ryder on television, because he's not going anywhere. You know it, bro.

HONOURABLE MENTIONS: Daniel Bryan, Drew McIntyre, Dolph Ziggler.

*****

Song Of The Day:

If there's anything that RAW and Smackdown! have in common, it's that both shows have been producing some crappy first hours of television the past few weeks. Honestly, save a segment or a match, both RAW and Smackdown!'s first hour has been pretty meaningless recently. I understand that the second hour usually contains the bigger stars, but would it kill the writers to space out the talent a bit more? Kelly Kelly, David Otunga, Michael McGillicutty, and Sgt. Slaughter should never appear in back-to-back time slots ever again. It's like watching paint dry at a funeral, but worse.

If there's anything YOU want to share with ME, there's four easy ways to do so:

- Send me an e-mail at captain_charisma16@hotmail.com
- Befriend me or message me on Facebook (www.Facebook.com/Super.Chrisss)
- Follow me on Twitter at twitter.com/chrisss16
- Take the lazy way out and leave a comment below.

That's all I have for now. Until next time, keep on Wooing and spiking that hair of yours.

#RyderOrRiot

Source: lordsofpain.net