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1. Day 583 - Hardcore Justice Predictions (What I'd Do & What Will Probably Happen)

2. Day 584 - New Music

2.5 Day 585 - Raw Running Diary

4. Day 586 - Na-Na-Na-Na.. Na-Na-Na-Na.. Hey-Hey-Hey.. Goodbye

Day 583
LOL

Honestly, I think TNA's Hardcore Justice pay-per-view looks to have one of the worst match lineups in recent memory, but because I'm a soldier, I'm going to go ahead and preview the event, anyway. Seriously, though, I know some big-time TNA fans that will tell you the card for Hardcore Justice is a weak one overall. I wouldn't be surprised in the slightest if this ended up coming close to some all-time low buyrate numbers for the TNA. It just doesn't seem like they care much about the show, outside of the main event. Let's not waste any more time, though. Shall I proceed? (Yes, indeed.) Less dew eet!!

Devon VS D'Angelo Dinero - Bound For Glory Series Match
What I'd Do: First and foremost, if you look at the current standings in the Bound For Glory Series, you'll see that Devon is currently tied for fourth place with 28 points, while Dinero is sitting in tenth place with 10 points. Clearly, this is a match that Dinero needs to win if he has any hope of placing himself in position to win the entire shebangabang and getting the World Title shot at Bound For Glory. To this day, I still don't buy Devon as a singles guy, and I probably never will. He's a solid enough worker and all, but there just isn't anywhere near the type of connection with crowds that is needed to work singles matches, especially when you compare him to his former tag team partner, Bully Ray. Because of that, I'd have to give the win to The Pope here, moving him up in the rankings.

What Will Probably Happen: TNA is playing out a storyline between these two where Devon's two sons look up to Dinero, but because Devon doesn't trust Dinero, he's been instructing his sons to stay away from The Pope, and vice versa. Of course, nobody is listening to him, and it's driving him further and further into losing his shit in anger. This could be going in a few different directions, so it's good that things aren't 100% predictable. We could be leading to a heel turn for Devon, which basically makes a face turn for Dinero. We could be leading to Dinero showing his true colors and solidifying his heel status. We could be leading to Devon's sons turning heel on him and aligning with Dinero. Whatever happens, I think Dinero gets the victory here, which will only further frustrate Devon in whatever road he's going down at the moment.

Rob Van Dam VS Crimson - Bound For Glory Series Match
What I'd Do: Another look at the standings in the series show you that Crimson is in first place with 38 points, but Van Dam is right behind him in second place with 35 points. That makes this match pretty big in the grand scheme of things, I guess. On one hand, because I think Crimson isn't anywhere near as good as TNA would like you to believe, and because his undefeated streak is a crock of shit, I'd have him lose here, just to show some vulnerability, as well as a change in the overall standings. On the other hand, though, if they've spent all this time building him up and having him defeat some big names, having his undefeated streak end to RVD in a random match at a random pay-per-view really doesn't make a whole lot of sense, and makes the wins he's had seem pretty shallow. Because of that, I'd have Crimson win. His undefeated streak will end eventually, of course, but I wouldn't do it here.

What Will Probably Happen: I'm pretty sure TNA sees this one the way I do. If they're going to spend the time and effort in getting his undefeated streak going, his first loss has to be something major. They can't blow it like WCW did with Goldberg, and I don't think they will. Not here, anyway. Crimson is victorious.

Tara & Ms. Tessmacher VS Rosita & Sarita - Knockout Tag Team Title Match
What I'd Do: The same thing I always say when it comes to the Knockout Tag Team Titles.. scrap the fucking things until you have more than a dozen Knockouts on the roster. With Gail Kim and Melina being free agents, TNA should look to bring them in, but even then, that's 90 days away from taking place. Bring the titles back then, and sign some more Knockouts between now and that particular point in time. Either that, or give up the idea of having the titles, period. If I have to pick a team to have win the match, I guess I'd go with Tara & Ms. Tessmacher, simply for the fact that they just won the titles a couple weeks ago. Might as well see what they can do with them, right?

What Will Probably Happen: I have a sneaking suspicion that I'm not going to get what I "want" here. For some reason, even though they haven't proven that they deserve it, it seems like the company wants to push the Mexican America stable, and when you combine that with the fact that they're probably happy with Sarita for working through her bout with facial paralysis, I think it adds up to new champions here.

Mr. Anderson VS Bully Ray
What I'd Do: Stab Anderson in the head with a trident. If that wasn't possible, I guess I'd have.. well, I don't know yet. For one, I don't know what the hell the company is doing with Anderson. He hasn't been a full-fledged face or hell in what seems like his entire tenure with TNA. He's always a face that is doing heel-ish things, or a heel that is acting "cool" and getting pops from the crowd, and because of that, it's almost impossible to book him and predict what will happen. As much as I think he sucks, the TNA faithful want to cheer Anderson, and because of that, I'd work on making him a face. None of this "tweener" bullshit. For that to be set in motion, I'd give Anderson the win here, but then have him attacked after the match by Bully Ray, who would brutally beat him down.

What Will Probably Happen: I bet you TNA doesn't even know the answer to this one just yet. I'm not even going to try and wrap my head around this one, so let's just go with my "What I'd Do" scenario, for shits and giggles.. Anderson wins, but gets attacked after the match and ends up being laid out, possibly with some blood. Something. Anything.

Mickie James VS Winter - Knockouts Title Match
What I'd Do: End the insipid storyline between Winter and Angelina Love. It was dumb when it started, and the fact that it has gone on for this long is a testament to the half-wit minds that book TNA. I like Winter. I think she's a fine performer, and she's also attractive if you're into that 1920's swimsuit model style of hers. However, she should be moved on to other things. I'd have Angelina get involved, "accidentally" costing Winter the match, and having Mickie retain the title. Then, depending on how froggy I felt, I'd either have Angelina's turn happen after the match, or I'd use this to plant the seeds for an upcoming turn. Either way, let's just end the storyline.

What Will Probably Happen: I think it's pretty clear that the company is building towards an eventual Mickie James VS Velvet Sky title match, and because of that simple fact, look for Mickie to win here. Why anyone would think Mickie VS Velvet would be a match that would sell is beyond me, but it's definitely what they're aiming for. I also don't think Angelina will turn face here, nor will any seeds be planted for an eventual turn. I think that comes further down the road.

Fortune (AJ Styles, Christopher Daniels & Kazarian) VS Immortal (Abyss, Scott Steiner & Gunner) - Six Man Tag Match
What I'd Do: Well, let's see.. I think Abyss sucks, I think Gunner sucks, and I think Scott Steiner should only be entertaining folks with promos these days. Should that answer things for you folks? AJ Styles shouldn't be continuing to lose to the likes of Gunner. I think it's pretty clear that Christopher Daniels is on the verge of turning heel, and that's fine, but I'd still have Fortune get the win here, probably with AJ getting the pin, maybe making Daniels jealous, or whatever it is that he's feeling that is leading to the heel turn.

What Will Probably Happen: The opposite of what I'd do, more than likely. TNA can't book AJ Styles consistently to save their lives, and this will probably be no different. I think we do get the Daniels heel turn here, and he'll end up walking out on AJ after slapping him in the face or something because of some in-match miscommunication. In the aftermath, with AJ and Kazarian wondering what happened.. BOOM.. Black Hole Slam.. Immortal wins, and people continue shaking their heads.

Brian Kendrick VS Austin Aries VS Alex Shelley - Three Way Match for the X-Division Title
What I'd Do: Let these men do what they do in the ring. While I'm still not the biggest fan of Kendrick, I won't deny that he can "go", and when you throw in two of my favorites in Aries and Shelley, you have the makings of a match I'm really looking forward to. It's a weird situation, though, but TNA only has themselves to blame for it. Kendrick just won the title, finally defeating Abyss and "righting the wrong" that was Eric Bischoff trying to destroy the X-Division. That should have made Kendrick a hero to the TNA fans. What does TNA do next, after making Kendrick defeat Abyss again? They place him in a match with two guys that are not only better than he is, but considerably more over with the crowd, essentially making him an afterthought. That's why I said, last month, that Kendrick should not have been the one to defeat Abyss. Oh well. I'll be nice to Kendrick here. I think they owe it to him to see if they can make his title reign something special, so that's what I'd do here. It seems the feud is more between Shelley and Aries, anyway, so I'd let them beat each other down, and let Kendrick pick his spot to come in and get the win.

What Will Probably Happen: I don't think it's exactly a stretch to say that the company seems like they want to push Austin Aries. I don't think there's anything wrong with that, mind you. I'm simply pointing out what I see. As much as I like Alex Shelley, I think he makes for a much better "hunter" than he does "hunted", and I think the company sees that, too, so I'm picking Aries to win the title by pulling some sort of shenaniganery on Shelley, setting up another match between them down the road. Everyone wins that way. Well, except for Brian Kendrick, but as long as he has his weed, he'll be fine.

Beer Money VS Hernandez & Anarquia - TNA Tag Team Title Match
What I'd Do: Have Beer Money win the match in dominating fashion. Hernandez fucking sucks, and Anarquia isn't even considered a wrestler, in my opinion. There's no reason for them to be getting any sort of push whatsoever, so fuck em. Beer Money wins.

What Will Probably Happen: Remember earlier, when I said that it seems the company wants to push Mexican America, even though none of them deserve it? Yeah, about that.. having the stable consist of the Tag Team Champions and the Knockouts Tag Team Champions would be a good way to continue pushing them, because they can talk about how dominant they are, how they have so much gold (and not just on the Dayton rims on their lowriders, for once), etc. As much as it pains me to say (you know what I mean) it.. as much as it will pain me to see it.. I think Hernandez and Anarquia win the titles here. I'm already shaking my head.

Sting VS Kurt Angle - TNA World Title Match
What I'd Do: The average TNA fan is absolutely in love with the new "Joker" character of Sting. The average TNA fan is in love with Sting, period, but this new phase in his career has them praising how he's been able to have such a character change at this advanced stage in his career. They're eternally thankful for everything they feel Sting has done for the company since making his debut, and if it were up to him, he'd probably wrestle there for another 20 years. Unfortunately for them, and for Sting, I'm not the average TNA fan. Sure, Sting has accomplished a lot in his career, and is a definite legend of the pro wrestling industry, but at 52 years of age, he's nowhere near the performer he used to be, and he should be thinking about riding off into the sunset soon. Kurt Angle's nearly 43, which says something about the current main event scene in TNA, but he's the "young" guy in this match, and is also the one that is still capable of putting on lengthy and/or entertaining matches, so he has to be my choice of who I'd have win the match.

What Will Probably Happen: I think TNA is building the stage for Kurt to finally "overcome the odds" and defeat Sting (even though he has apparently forgotten the fact that he's defeated Sting twice in the past). I also think, as I've said in previous columns, that TNA is building the stage for Sting VS Hulk Hogan at Bound For Glory. I'm hoping and praying that we get a clean pay-per-view main event finish, but that just isn't TNA's M.O. now, is it? Look for Immortal to become involved in the match somehow, and look for Hogan himself to get involved, further planting the seeds for Sting VS Hogan down the road. With all of that gobbledygoo, Angle should be able to catch Sting off-guard and get the win to become the new TNA World Champion.

Writer's Note: Special Happy Birthday shout-out to the homie, Steak Sauce (that's his real name, and it says so right there on his birth certificate). Don't know how you keep doing what you do at 75 years of age, but you're doing it, so all the power to you.

The HiPE Playlist: UFC 133.

You know, Spider, you're a fuckin mumbling stuttering little fuck, you know that?

Hustle
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-Team Sleep-------------------------Day 584

*By Request*

I was having a conversation with a few people the other day, and the subject of entrance music came up. Specifically, wrestlers that need new entrance music, and it was requested that I do a column on the subject. There are a few wrestlers that I feel could really use a new entrance theme, but I'm not really going to get into what I think their new song should be. When people talk about this topic, it usually ends up with "so-and-so should use such-and-such song by Metallica" or "this particular person should use this particular song by Jay-Z", etc. We all know "real" songs being used for entrance music is definitely more the exception than it is the rule, so I'm not going that route. It's just not realistic. Alright, enough jibba jabba. Shall I proceed? (Yes, indeed.) Less dew eet!!

Daniel Bryan: I know, I know.. he just got new entrance music, and it's music that I've praised, but this one comes with a bit of an asterisk, especially considering what I said in my column intro about "real" songs. At this point, many of you can already see where I'm going with this one, but for everyone else, I truly and honestly believe that, if Bryan is going to be pushed to the main event scene, and if he's going to build more of a connection with live crowds all over the planet, the company needs to spend the money to acquire the rights to "The Final Countdown" by Europe. For those unaware, that was Bryan Danielson's entrance music on the independent scene for years, and was one of the things he was "known" for. Not only is the song catchy, but the older fans already know the song and can respond to it immediately. If he used the song like he did on the indy scene, when he'd use his entrance, get in the ring, and then stall for a bit until ascending to the middle turnbuckle as the crowd all sings along with the song's hook.. well, that would be great. Not only would it sound cool to have thousands of people singing "IT'S THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWWNNNNN!!!" in unison, but that's definitely something simple enough for the younger fans to sing along with, even though they've probably never heard the song before. Everyone knows how much kids like to participate in things like that, so it helps Bryan get over with a new demographic. Honestly, though, I don't think he should get to use the song until the Road To WrestleMania officially gets underway, if not at WrestleMania itself. WrestleMania is when they like to spend the extra dough on music and entrances, anyway, so it makes sense.

David Otungs & Michael McGillicutty: I'd prefer it if they were out of a job, but my luck isn't that good, so I'll just focus on getting them a new song, because their current entrance music, as I've mentioned, might be the worst entrance theme going today, and maybe in recent memory. It's just awful. There isn't a single redeeming quality about it. Don't believe me? Check it out..

Would anyone like to explain why they're using Justin Gabriel's music? I get that he used to be stablemates with them and all, but the "used to be" is the key part of that. The song still would be awful if it brought Gabriel to the ring, but at least it would fit and make sense. As it is, the song does nothing, and certainly isn't helping to get Otunga and McGillicutty over with crowds, as evidenced by all those crickets you hear during their entrances. Of course, the fact that they both suck has a lot to do with that, but still, a better song would be a nice start in trying to help them out a bit.

TNA, in general: Let me make one thing clear.. this isn't "TNA bashing" or anything along those lines. I have plenty of major TNA fans that agree with me on this point.. a lot of the songs in TNA are just generic-sounding songs that don't stand out at all. There are a few exceptions, of course. I think Abyss' music fits him pretty well. Sting's music stands out and really works, although people will question it's worth with his new character direction. Rob Van Dam's music gets made fun of for its repetitive lyrics, but it does stand out, and it goes back to that point about people loving to chant along. Winter has very distinctive music, and it definitely fits the vibe that her character has. Everyone else, short of a catchphrase to start the song ("Hard-Core Coun-try!" for Mickie James, "MIIIIIIIIIISTERRRRRRRR!" for Mr Anderson, "Get ready to fly!" for AJ Styles, etc), should probably have something done to help them stand out a bit more. Off the top of my head, I don't know who the person is that handles all of TNA's in-house entrance music, but they should probably be replaced. I think people overlook just how important entrance music is, as a whole, for wrestling promotions. If TNA had someone like Jim Johnston on their payroll, it would go a long way in getting people to see them as something of a credible threat to WWE's proverbial throne.

Natalya: This one comes with another asterisk. She turned heel on Smackdown, but after actually getting to watch Smackdown, instead of just reading the spoiler report, she still acted as a face after her attack on AJ. Also, she and Beth Phoenix will be walking a fine line between heel and face, in my opinion. They've both attacked face Divas, yes, but like we've seen with CM Punk, a large portion of the WWE Universe will agree with what they have to say, and because of that, will cheer them. That's where the asterisk kicks in. If Natalya actually goes full-fledged heel, then she remains included here, but if she stays a face, or if she ends up as some sort of tweener, then I would no longer include her here. That intro from Bret Hart's old entrance music is pretty much guaranteed to get a face pop from crowds, which is somewhat counterproductive when you're trying to build a heel up. It might not even be a case of changing her music overall. If she's going to be a heel, it would work if they just changed the beginning of the song instead, dropping the familiar guitar sound, because her song itself fits her.

John Cena: I'll bet you weren't expecting this one, were you? Guess what, though? Yup.. this one comes with an asterisk, as well. You already know what it is if you've paid any attention to my columns in the last year or so. If/when Cena turns heel, he can't keep the same entrance music. He just can't. It's far too ingrained in our heads as a face song. As the song of the man who fought for all the "rights" in the world, and who stood for Hustle (whoo!), Loyalty and Respect. As the song of the man that had children all over the world look up to him as a hero. It would be like Hulk Hogan becoming "Hollywood" Hulk Hogan with the nWo, but still coming to the ring to his "Real American"-ripoff, "American Made". It just wouldn't make any sense. It wouldn't take a whole lot of effort to have Cena get back into a studio somewhere to record a new song for a heel turn, if that's the direction they want to go in. With his character having gone in a different direction a couple years ago, maybe they'd want to have someone else handle his entrance music this time around, instead of having him try to go back to being a "rapper". Unless, of course, that becomes part of his heel character again. Obviously, "The Time Is Now" is the king of entrance themes in this day and age, as far as immediately grabbing your attention and eliciting a response is concerned. That's fine and all, but like I said, it just won't work at all if it's used for him after he turns heel. It just won't.

The HiPE Playlist: "No Church In The Wild" by Jay-Z, Kanye West & Frank Ocean.. "Niggas In Paris" by Jay-Z & Kanye West.. "That's My Bitch" by Jay-Z, Kanye West & Uncle Charlie Wilson.. "Who Gon Stop Me" by Jay-Z & Kanye West.. "Made In America" by Jay-Z, Kanye West & Frank Ocean.. "Why I Love You" by Jay-Z, Kanye West & Mr Hudson (no, not David Otunga).. "Illest Motherfucker Alive" by Jay-Z & Kanye West.. "Primetime" by Jay-Z & Kanye West.. "Memory Lane" by Ace Hood & Kevin Cossum.. "Lord Knows" by Ace Hood

I'm sorry. I'm not sorry. Okay? I'm not gonna apologize. I'm a cocksman!

-------------------------Day 585

9:00pm: Here we go with the go-home show, leading up to an incredibly important pay-per-view for WWE. They've built up a whole lot of momentum with this CM Punk storyline, and there's a good chance that momentum could multiply, depending on what happens in the SummerSlam main event. On the other hand, there's also a good chance that the momentum will come to a screeching halt, depending on what happens in the SummerSlam main event. We shall see.

9:01pm: Triple H is out to start the show this week. Anyone having flashbacks?

9:04pm: Trips just made himself the Special Guest Referee for CM Punk VS John Cena at SummerSlam. The crowd's reaction? Well, it sounded like six people cheered, and the rest were silent. I can already hear people complaining about Triple H "stealing the spotlight" here. It was such a poorly executed announcement, with no hype (again, different than HIPE) and no crowd reaction.

9:06pm: Both Punk and Cena will be in-action tonight, apparently, with Cena's match taking place.. right now.. which brings out one of the WWE Champions (that's just funny to type).

9:07pm: "Whatever happens in that match, it'll be because it's what I want to happen." - Triple H, said off-mic, to Cena. Uh-oh. Someone's getting screwed this Sunday.

9:11pm: Jack Swagger is out as Cena's opponent here. These two have had some entertaining matches in the past, so this could be fun, if they want to make it happen.

9:15pm: This might be one of the worst Cena matches in a long time, as far as crowd reaction is concerned. The haters aren't as vocal as they usually are, and the fans don't appear to be around that much.

9:17pm: ..which means, of course, that the crowd heat picks up as I type all that. Nice heat for the last minute or so of the match, but Cena picks up the victory, as would be expected. Definitely not the best Cena VS Swagger match we've ever seen, though.

9:23pm: This week's SummerSlam Rewind is from 1991, with Mr Perfect defending the Intercontinental Title against Bret Hart in what was an absolutely fantastic technical masterpiece. RIP, Curt Hennig.

9:25pm: They've chosen Alberto Del Rrrrrio to face CM Punk tonight? Interesting choice, and one that will definitely make sure Punk gets the face reaction during the match.

9:28pm: Another R-Truth promo about his dislike for spiders, and then he mentions that his Grandmama used to make "Spider Stew". WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF BIG FUCKING SPIDERS ARE FROM HIS NECK OF THE WOODS, WHERE THEY CAN BE COOKED AND TURNED INTO A FUCKING STEW?!? I'm going to make a mental note not to ever vacation there.

9:32pm: The Miz attacks Rey Mysterio during Rey's entrance for their match. I guess this is to play up the injury he suffered during the house show circuit this weekend.

9:34pm: Miz attacked Mysterio because he's upset at not being booked for a match at SummerSlam. He said he did it to get a little bit of "attention" for himself, and now he wants to be declared the winner of the match by forfeit.

9:37pm: A Referee is out, but not to give Miz a forfeit victory. He has an announcement from Triple H, and that is that Miz now has himself a new opponent tonight.. and that brings Kofi Kingston out. Kofi VS Miz works for me.

9:39pm: Michael Cole going on about how "great" Miz looked at the Teen Choice Awards is really creepy. The fuck, man?

9:44pm: Miz seems to have stepped his level of aggression up tonight. It really works for him and his offense.

9:49pm: Miz wins. Nice back-and-forth match. Again, Miz stepping up his level of aggression was nice. It's something I feel has been missing from his in-ring work in recent weeks. Good to see it back.

9:51pm: "Triple H needs that spotlight. It's like he's solar powered or something." - CM Punk. That's going to be a line that gets quoted a lot by the IWC. Good stuff.

9:56pm: Punk VS ADR at the top of the second hour. Here we go.

9:57pm: That Audi that ADR brought out is a nice car. Consider that a blatant understatement.

9:58pm: It's still insanely cool to hear "Cult Of Personality" on a weekly basis. Great song.

10:02pm: Punk is getting a more consistent crowd reaction than Cena did earlier. That's something important to think about and to remember. Punk isn't getting the usual "Cena" pops, as far as overall volume is concerned, but there haven't been many quiet spots in this match.

10:04pm: Punk wins. ADR loses in less than five minutes. That doesn't exactly do much for him, now does it?

10:11pm: Beth Phoenix and that smile of hers.. awesome. I want to see her rip someone apart, limb from limb.

10:12pm: ..right on cue, Eve comes out as Beth's opponent, and has some new entrance music that I still don't care about.

10:13pm: Jerry Lawler is now blatantly stealing jokes from Larry The Cable Guy. Think about that for a moment.

10:15pm: Eve, botching moves since.. well.. since she started wrestling.

10:15pm: Michael Cole goes from dissing faces for liking comic books to discussing which member of the X-Men he would be. That makes perfect sense.

10:16pm: Beth wins. Good.

10:16pm: Beth says she's tired of people like Eve and Kelly Kelly making a mockery of the Divas division, and it gets a pop from the crowd. I told you folks that it would get her and Natalya some face reactions.

10:17pm: lol @ Kelly making a sneak attack on Beth, and then, instead of continuing the beatdown like would make sense, she bails to check on Eve in the ring. Beth, snap that worthless heifer in half at SummerSlam, please?

10:21pm: ZOMG BIEBER FEVER~!

10:23pm: The band members of Downstrait continue to gnaw on their fingernails as we get Alex Riley VS Dolph Ziggler here.

10:24pm: Apparently, Vickie Guerrero's breath smells like Death took a dump in her mouth..

10:26pm: In the time it took me to type out the HTML coding for that picture, the match is over, with Vickie slapping Riley, causing a DQ. Dolph and Vickie are fighting to absolutely zero crowd reaction. I guess it makes sense. Neither Ziggler nor Vickie has been portrayed as any type of character that the fans can cheer, so they're just sitting back and watching them fight, not knowing how to respond. Good job, WWE.

10:31pm: Using NFL Films music to help narrate a CM Punk VS John Cena video package, complete with John Facenda-style voice work? Awesome.

10:36pm: Holy shit, R-Truth is walking to the ring to the exact amount of crowd noise that I would get if I were the one walking to the ring. This crowd is dead.

10:39pm: When they came back from commercial, Truth was standing in the ring, jawing at the crowd, and there was actually some heel heat being heard. He must have really pissed them off during the break to raise them from the dead like that.

10:40pm: John Morrison VS Truth. The crowd is back to being silent.

10:44pm: Morrison throws punches like a child. It looks so bad when he tries to brawl.

10:45pm: Truth wins. Morrison loses yet again. He's looked pretty bad since making his return, but this time, you have to wonder if he's being punished for his public comments about his girlfriend, Melina, after her release from the company. Melina's head game had better be off the chain, because she's really costing Morrison a lot in his professional career. I hope she's worth it, John.

10:51pm: Christian, appearing live via satellite, on Raw. You know, the show he isn't on. The entire point of his appearance was to say that he has something to say on Smackdown this week, and that it would behoove Triple H to be there in person to hear it. They couldn't just have Cole or Jim Ross make that announcement for him?

10:52pm: Here we go with tonight's "main event".. the contract signing for CM Punk VS John Cena at SummerSlam. Triple H and John Laurinaitis are both in the ring.

10:53pm: A "Hire Kings Of Wrestling" sign gets TV time. Nice.

10:56pm: The Rock makes an appearance. Well, kind of. It's the "promo" he cut on Cena via Facebook a few weeks ago. I bring it.. via Facebook. Also, it's the same jokes he's been making about Cena since WrestleMania. What happened to the originality? What happened to how clever he used to be? What happened to all of that?

10:58pm: lol @ the camera cutting to John Cena's face after Rock's "promo" aired, and he's clearly blushing and embarrassed by the entire thing.

10:59pm: lol x2 @ Punk now making fun of the voice Rock uses to mock Cena.

11:02pm: LMAO @ Cena referencing the "Five Moves Of Doom". He pays attention to the IWC!

11:05pm: Wait.. Punk is now referencing the recent firings of Vladimir Kozlov, David Hart Smith (who Punk referred to by his real name of Harry Smith) and Chris Masters (who Punk correctly stated has worked his ass off in the last year). Let the "shoot" begin.

11:08pm: Cena looks like he's legitimately having a blast here, listening to Punk cut this promo. Every time Punk says something scathing against him, he breaks out into a big smile and is clearly holding back laughter.

11:11pm: Damn you, John.. Milli Vanilli had more than one hit. Take the slander back!

11:12pm: Punk and Cena come face-to-face, ready to fight.. Laurinaitis gets in between them, and gets kicked in the back of the head by Punk for his troubles.. Triple H goes to hold Punk back, but Cena charges and strikes Punk, knocking Triple H down in the process.. Triple H gets back up and shoves Cena. THE PLOT. IT THICKENS. Really good final segment to sell the upcoming match.

#ThankYouColtCabana: Kofi Kingston VS The Miz.. The Miz finding the extra aggression that he's been missing in recent weeks.. Beth Phoenix's smile.. The "NFL Films" video package.. The entire final segment, setting up the main event of SummerSlam

#FuckYouScottyGoldman: Piss-poor execution of Triple H's announcement to start the show.. Alberto Del Rrrrrio's strange booking.. Kelly Kelly being a phony "tough girl".. Poor booking of a potential breakup between Dolph Ziggler and Vickie Guerrero

Grade: C+

The HiPE Playlist: Raw.

Do that funky dance, Uncle Kel Kel!

-------------------------Day 586

*By Request*

I've been asked, repeatedly, about my thoughts on the recent round of cuts that WWE has made. It's not like some legit main eventers were given their proverbial pink slips or anything, but it's still newsworthy, and therefore, worth talking about.

To be perfectly honest, the only release that could eventually hurt (and even then, it won't hurt much) is that of Chris Masters. Of course, most everyone reading this right now has just thrown up in their mouths a bit after reading that. The reason for that is because they don't watch Superstars and/or NXT. Masters has been one of the most used workers on Superstars, seemingly appearing on a weekly basis, and on top of that, he was a "Pro" on the previous season of NXT. With all of that work on the shows where wrestlers have a lot more freedom to work with, as far as putting their matches together goes, I'd argue that nobody has improved more in the last year or two than Masters had. That isn't to say he's a five-star worker right now, but he has come a long, long way from his early days as "The Masterpiece". Even with all of those improvements, though, he hasn't been on television much. His last appearance on television was the April 25th episode of Raw, and even then, that was in a Battle Royal. During the previous week's Smackdown taping, he lost a one-on-one match to Drew McIntyre. Think about that, folks. Masters hasn't even appeared on television since Drew Fucking McIntyre was winning matches. That's a long time. If you aren't going to be on television for that long, it's pretty clear that the Creative Team doesn't really have anything for you (we've heard that one before), and a release is coming in only a matter of time. He's already playing it up, mentioning that he feels it's time for him to go and make an "impact" somewhere else. While most would scoff at the idea of TNA adding yet another WWE castaway, I think it works. When you look at the people in Masters' general size range (6'4", 260 pounds) or larger on the TNA roster, Masters is a better worker than most of them are. Abyss, Bully Ray, Crimson, Devon, Hernandez, Rob Terry, Scott Steiner, Sting.. based on pure in-ring work alone, Masters is better than all of them. He also has something of a "name" value with his time in WWE, so that's got to count for something, right?

Melina is a very interesting case. She's not a bad worker. She never really has been. However, trouble just seems to follow her everywhere, from her days beefing with Mickie James when they were both working in developmental together all the way to now, when she still seems to be getting into trouble (and possibly getting John Morrison in trouble in the process) by showing up backstage at events after being released. When you have a worker like that, there's almost no excuse to keep them around. They're not worth the trouble. You could almost make a case for someone like that if they're selling a bunch of merchandise and main eventing pay-per-views, bringing in millions of dollars a year for the company. Melina isn't one of those people. She isn't selling a whole lot of merchandise, and she damn sure wasn't main eventing any pay-per-views. Like I said.. simply not worth the trouble. She had to go, and while we're on the topic, Morrison has to go, as well, if he's going to continue letting his dick do his thinking for him. I get that it's your girlfriend and all, but there's not a smart person alive that would feel it's a good idea to bring her to events with you when she was just released from the company. If they wanted her there, they wouldn't have released her in the first place! Just a dumb move, but he's shown that he doesn't do any of the decision-making in that relationship, so I'd be willing to bet that it was Melina's idea. Again, the first direction everyone looks at is TNA, and if so, it would be a great move for TNA. Adding Melina to their Knockouts roster would be a big move. She's one of the biggest "names" in women's wrestling today, and her entrance that focuses more on sexuality than anything else fits right in with TNA's general direction for their Knockouts.

With someone like David Hart Smith, you have someone that should have been a much better performer than they were. Just on the "eyeball exam", you'd think he could've/should've/would've been a huge star. 6'5" tall, 250 pounds, jacked.. then you throw in his second-generation status, as well as all of the training he's received in his brief time on the planet.. all the pieces were there. Unfortunately, the guy seemed to have the personality of the average cantaloupe, and that basically destroyed his chances from the day he debuted for World Wrestling Entertainment. I've already seen some people talk about how he could be a star for TNA, and while that might be true, it doesn't look like that's going to happen, at least not anytime soon. If you believe his mother, he's headed to the MMA promotion Strikeforce. That's something we should have seen coming, as he's been doing heavy MMA training for a while now, even while still being employed by WWE. With his size, power and submission training, I think he could be successful as a Mixed Martial Artist one day. As an added bonus, he doesn't need to have much of a personality at all to succeed in MMA. Score!

Vladimir Kozlov.. oh, Vladimir Kozlov.. what a fall from grace. It wasn't all that long ago that he was primed for a main event push, and looked like he was going to be a monster heel. Then came the main event of Survivor Series 2008, with Triple H and Kozlov plodding along to what many felt was the absolute worst match of the year. If not for the surprise return of Edge during the match, it might have been viewed as being an even worse match. The entire thing didn't even last 15 minutes, but it felt like it went on for 60 minutes. I think Kozlov received far too much of the blame over the match tanking the way it did. At the time, he barely had three years of experience in the pro wrestling business, and Triple H, as the obvious "ring general" should have done a better job in carrying the match and finding ways to ad-lib when things weren't going as planned. Of course, it's Triple H, though, so who exactly is going to come to him backstage and tell him that it was his fault? Of course Kozlov was going to take the blame for just about everything, and from there, it was a steady decline down the rankings until he wasn't even being used on television anymore. The release didn't come as a surprise to me, and it shouldn't have come as a surprise to anyone else. As far as TNA goes, the interesting thing about Kozlov is that, despite his relatively brief time in pro wrestling, he's still 39 years old. How much time could he possibly have left? Of course, this is TNA we're talking about. They have numerous people on the roster over the age of 40, so Kozlov might fit right in.

I know there's some buzz that the releases are something of a work because of CM Punk name-dropping Masters and Smith on Raw this week, but what would be the point in that exactly? Is Punk going to threaten to leave the company again, and as an added "perk" to his new contract, he has the company bring these people back? Are they going to return as "outsiders" and be Punk's new stable? People won't care anywhere near enough if those things happen. I think Punk's comments were just to get people talking, and they won't lead to much of anything.

Oh, and if you're wondering why I'm not talking about Gail Kim, it's for two reasons..

1. She didn't get released. She asked for her release, and it wasn't granted to her.

2. If you've signed a contract, and in said contract, it says that you're required to do certain things, you'd better fucking do those required things when it is asked of you. She quit. She quit on the company. She quit on her co-workers. She quit on the fans. She deserves no sympathy from anyone, and I hope they force her to do all kinds of dumb shit on television to humiliate her on the way out the door.

Your turn, ReaderLand. What do you think of the releases? Do you even care? Think any of them can find success without "The E"? Holla at ya boy and let me know what's on your mind.

The HiPE Playlist: "Between The Sheets" by The Isley Brothers.. "Footsteps In The Dark" by The Isley Brothers.. "What You Won't Do For Love" by Bobby Caldwell.. "Open Your Eyes" by Bobby Caldwell.. "As Long As I've Got You" by The Charmels.. "It's Too Late" by Otis Redding.. "Before I Let Go" by Maze & Frankie Beverly.. "Home Is Where The Hatred Is" by Gil Scott-Heron.. "I'll Be Around" by The Spinners.. "Don't Disturb This Groove" by The System

UNDERPANTS!

Source: lordsofpain.net